Have you ever wondered how could you possibly love another baby as much as you love your first child?
After college I babysat two adorable, creative, precocious little girls who were about two years apart. I remember their mom mentioning that before having her second she worried if she could ever love another baby as much as she loved her first. Spoiler alert: she readily fell in love with her second baby, too, of course.
That was my first time hearing anyone speak about this phenomenon that first time mamas face before they meet their second child.
So many of us moms worry during our second pregnancies about how our hearts could possibly have enough room to love another child as much as we love our first baby. I think this feeling is only natural because the love we experience as first-time mamas is so crazy big and earth-shattering. It makes sense that we would wonder how our hearts could possibly expand enough to be filled with such a huge, life-altering kind of love again (and again and again if you keep havin’ babies)…
Here’s the good news, sweet mamas: your heart will instantly grow when you meet your second baby. It’s not scientific or rational, but I think our hearts “double” in size with each of our babies.
I have such a deep, heart-to-heart bond with my first son, Everson, so I found myself wondering how things would go when I had our second son, Adler. But, it really was love at first sight when I met my precious Adler Patrick…every glorious inch of his big 10 pound self. He had a full head of black hair and I couldn’t stop kissing his big, sweet cheeks.
In fact, two years ago tonight I went into active labor with Adler and I excitedly anticipated his birth (in between contractions). I suppose that’s why I’m thinking about the experience of going from one baby to two…
My relationship with Adler is different than my relationship with Everson. I think Adler’s love language is quality time, whereas Everson’s love language is physical touch. So Adler’s love tank gets filled up when we spend time one on one together and Everson’s love tank refuels when we have a cuddle sesh together. It’s fun to learn how to love them both well in different ways that speak to their unique hearts…and I’m still learning new things about them each and every day!
If you have had more than one baby, how did the transition go for you? I know bonding is different for everyone and if PPD is a factor then that can majorly impact things. I’d love to hear how going from one to two babies went for you. And if you’re considering a second baby, does this worry ever cross your mind?